I want…Friday 2007 #10

 

(Photo courtesy of eScapesPhoto) 

I want this nice long holiday weekend to feel like it’s a longer weekend than it quite possibly will.  I know that’s a pessimistic attitude to take, but I’m hoping that between all the things that are lining up for the weekend, I’ll have some time to relax and enjoy the weekend.  I’m a little worried the weekend’s going to be gone before I know it since that’s how holiday weekends tend to be.  And, yes, some of the activities that are scheduled for this weekend are to catch up on some blog posts.  I’m not guaranteeing anything, but I’m going to try for a few posts. 

I want…Friday 2007 #9

I want to hang out with my friends from college more often. I miss the days when you could walk a few steps down the hall and hang out and we’d all just suddenly decide to do something on weekends. We’re all a bit scattered and now it takes planning to be able to see each other, so it doesn’t happen as often. Add into that all the individual lives with the various responsibilities and deadlines, and suddenly we can’t all get together anymore. I managed to go several years being able to see my college friends at any point in time things came up. But the past year, family obligations (not just my family, but also Mr. B’s family) and work have interfered to the point where I’ve hardly seen and talked to them in the past year. It’s kinda sad actually…

(Note: I did actually write this yesterday after work, but I hadn’t had time to look for a picture and it took me a little while to find one and it’s still not quite what I originally wanted, but oh well. I’m a little too OCD to post it without any picture at all. It still bothers me that #2 doesn’t have one. )

A Little Sad Today

For some reason the other night when I went to sleep, I just got really sad – almost to the point of crying myself to sleep, though there wasn’t really any reason. After a bit, my thoughts turned to my grandfather. Well, that one was a little easier to explain. Today is his birthday. Unfortunately, he passed away 11 years ago on the Fourth of July. This usually doesn’t hit me this bad, but for some reason, this year it’s really getting to me. A couple weeks ago I was missing his applesauce. Today, I was just about to tears. I just miss my grandpa. I can’t imagine how my grandma is doing today.

And I’m hearing all the stuff on TV about the smoking ban in public places in Illinois, and I don’t think it’s a bad thing. They’ve been doing it in Kentucky for a while now, and granted there are a few differences in level of strictness, etc. but it hasn’t seemed to be a big deal in Kentucky – at least not that I’ve seen while I’ve been there. Normally I don’t get very vocal about smoking or stick my nose in someone’s business. If someone asks what I think, I tell them I don’t think they should be smoking, but it’s their choice and I’m not going to get up in their face about it. Why not? Cause most have already heard all the bad things about smoking and have made that choice. And most have gotten the “You shouldn’t smoke” lecture from so many people, they either get angry or defensive or just upset. And I can’t really blame them – always having people tell them what they should be doing or making them feel bad because they’re addicted to them. So yeah, I tend to keep my mouth shut unless asked.

However, on a day like today, I’ll tell you my thoughts on smoking. See, my grandfather died of lung cancer from smoking his whole life. We asked him to quit multiple times, and he did here and there, for a while. But he always started back up again. About midway through my freshman year of college, I found out my grandfather was sick. I remember being home from college (so around late May, early June) and being the only one home when the family called to let us know that Grandpa’s lungs had filled with fluid and they didn’t think he’d survive the night. I instantly started calling around to get ahold of my parents and brother (this was before we all had cell phones). Everyone came home instantly. That’s the one and only time I’ve seen my dad break down. It’s kind of scary when your dad, who’s always been the strong one, pulls you into a hug and breaks down instead of the other way around.

We started our 4-1/2 hr drive to hopefully get to the hospital in time. We don’t exactly live right near the rest of the family. We got there in the middle of the night and Grandpa recognized my dad. I guess he had been pretty out of it most of the night, but he knew my dad. He didn’t recognize or seem to even see the rest of us though. My uncle thought maybe he had been hanging on to see my dad, but he made it through the night. I finally got sleep about 9 that next morning. Everyone else had been taking little naps here and there, but I just couldn’t sleep until the next morning when they said he was out of immediate danger.

They ended up moving my grandpa into a nursing home and we went home. He was doing better for several weeks. On July 4th, Mom and I went to one of her friend’s house to go swimming for a while. When we got home, we found out my grandpa had just passed away. I remember feeling guilty for being out having fun, but I guess that’s the way life is. Anyway, long story short, I never really got to say goodbye to my grandpa cause he was too sick to recognize me. And I don’t think I’ll ever forget that. After 11 years, I still remember a lot of the details of that night – my dad breaking down, trying to get there, my grandpa not recognizing me, not sleeping, etc.

I don’t wish that on anyone. And I know you can’t always avoid these sorts of things, even if you do everything possible to take care of yourself. But why do something that increases your chances of putting your family through that? If you can’t do anything about it, that’s one thing. But why give it ammunition? And I’m not saying this to tell other people they shouldn’t smoke. People will continue to do whatever they want, regardless of what I think. But this is why I won’t smoke. And, well, I told it cause I can’t get it out of my head today…

A Rough Afternoon

I would say I was accident-prone this afternoon, but half of these were not of my making. The day started relatively quiet and I thought the afternoon was going to be more of the same. We had a division meeting in another building downtown early this afternoon that several of us walked down to. When crossing the last street before the building, we were crossing in the crosswalk when the walk light changed in our favor and proceeded to have a car run a red light as pass right in front of us. The lady was on a cell phone and didn’t seem to even realize she ran the red light. She almost hit the guy coming across the street from the other direction and looked at him like “No, I’m not going to hit you, though I have the right of way.”

On the way back from the division meeting, a lady barreled into one of the alleys downtown just before we were about to cross it. As she entered the alley, she screamed like she was mad and screeched to a stop. She threw the car into reverse and barreled straight back, looking the opposite direction we all were standing. Luckily, we had stopped before the alley trying to figure out what she was doing, otherwise she would have run into me and then through all the guys I was walking back with. She stopped right in front of me – I could have yelled in her window, but I never got the chance since she was screaming at some guy the other side of the car from us and then put the car in drive and barreled up the alley again. She probably never even realized we were there. As we walked past the guy, he said “Sorry. She’s blonde and has a ton of tickets – she shouldn’t even be driving.” I just about said something to him about about the blonde comment, but kept it to myself since my hairs gotten too dark to really be called blonde anymore. I guess that’s why he figured I wouldn’t care…

I thought that was to be the end of my incidents for the day, but after work, I got all the way down to my car and realized I left my keys sitting in my desk drawer. After going back for them, I ended up dropping them between the seat and center console, where I almost couldn’t get to them at all. It was beginning to make me wonder if I should be around cars at all today…

I did, however, make it to the comic shop and home again without incident.